Scene: flourescent lit department store.
Night before trip, zero-hour, attempting to procure a swim suit.
STORE CLERK (who I thought I could avoid simply by denying her eye contact, but was proven wrong): Hi! How can I help you?
ME: Not a reflection on your talents, but I don’t think you can.
STORE CLERK (undaunted): You’re looking for a new suit?
STORE CLERK: What sort of features are you looking for? Underwire? Ruching? Halter or tank straps?
ME: Have you seen the Harry Potter movies?
STORE CLERK(with the faintest glimmer that this may be going off the rails): Yes….
ME: So you remember the Invisibilty Cloak?
STORE CLERK: Yes?
ME: Yeah, what have you got in that material?
ME (eyes downcast): Just bring me something black.