I know, I know.
You’re cooler than Facebook.
Well, I’m not.
Despite its evils (lame status updates by your 3rd grade classmates, shadowy cabals of people gathering my information in return for telling me which pair of shoes I am, pictures of my friends’ friends’ grandma’s in bikinis that I can’t seem to unsee), I dig it.
More so, now.
Because I just figured out how to convert my Facebook account over to English (Pirate).
My Inbox is now my Bottle O’Messages. Instead of saying that you “like” something that someone’s said, you now let them know that “Arr, this be pleasin’ to me eye.” People are no longer “people”; they’re “scalliwags”. And instead of Facebook exhorting me to suck my friends in by email, they now encourage me to “Hoist y’self up yonder crow’s nest and use the Matey Scouter Weather-eye for jolly companions to find the scoundrels ’round Ye olde Facebook”.
The luster was fading. I was thinking of leaving.
But Facebook? Nice move.
(I wish I knew how to quit you.)