Ahhhhh….

 

Once upon a time, I went to Disney World. I was 18. Far too old to buy into it, really, but still young enough to be a little in love with it all. I am a ride wimp. The Tilt-a-Whirl is a little racy, if you ask me. But I was getting kind of brave by midday. And hot. Zaftig girls from Canada don’t do real well in Florida.

 

We lined up for Splash Mountain.

I got on the little log. The front of the little log. The ride starts with a meander through some kind of fake forest crap. It’s dark, cool, and pleasant. And then I heard the roar.

 

Why yes, I DID know the ride involved dropping down a 4 story column of water. I thought I could handle it. But as we got ever closer to the mouth, I panicked. Oh holy fuck, what had I done? And I hatched a plan, whereby I would remove my seatbelt, crawl off the ride, wait in the fake forest, and have my friends politely alert park authorities to my whereabouts. (Instead, the bitches laughed at me till they peed, and laughed even harder at the picture of us shooting down the waterfall, where the look on my face indicates that I am in the middle of delivering Satan’s child. Out my ass.)

 

That feeling, that “Oh holy fuck, what have I done?” feeling, has been with me for weeks.

 

A blogger I really enjoy, Maria, first led me to the site “Ask and Ye Shall Receive”. They loved her (of course). And they seemed to give some really good advice. And my masochistic self thought that sounded like a dandy place to submit my blog. So I did it.

 

Then, as the weeks went on, I got reeeeal scared. Some people got torn right the hell apart. What made me think I was going to fare any better?

 

Well, I can finally sleep again. It turned out OK. Actually, better than OK.

 

Thanks, everybody.

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14 responses to “Ahhhhh….

  1. I’m so, so fucking happy that you got a good review – you deserved it. Love Bites? One of the most awesome chicks you’ll ever meet!

  2. Thanks Maria! You started it 😉

    I was pretty sure I was going to get ripped apart. But it all worked out, thank god.

  3. Fun though, isn’t it…

  4. Hi, found you thru Ask Receive. Congrats on the great review!

    I’ve thought of submitting my blog to them but have a hot flash every time I think about it. Maybe one day if I get enough Amaretto Sours in me I just might do it.

  5. Xbox: Oh yeah, NOW it’s fun. For the past week, I’ve been waking up feeling like it might be Bizzaro Christmas Morning, and I’ll turn on the computer, and instead of festive gifts, there’ll be 4 flaming fingers. But at least now I can comment over there freely. And I’ve found some really kick arse blogs in the process.

    Musing: I LOVE your header! Gorgeous! Yeah, if you wait till you’re ready, you won’t do it. Wait for a moment of combined grandiosity and self-loathing, close your eyes and hit submit.

  6. Deserved, if for nothing else than your use of ‘arse’, ‘dandy’ and degrees celsius.

  7. (Instead, the bitches laughed at me till they peed, and laughed even harder at the picture of us shooting down the waterfall, where the look on my face indicates that I am in the middle of delivering Satan’s child. Out my ass.)
    RLMFAO!

  8. JT, I hereby promise that if I can track that picture down I will post it. It’s the least I can do.

  9. Please, please, find that picture.

  10. Not surprised, not one bit. 😉 Congratulations none the less. 🙂

  11. Thanks Peter! I’m still a little shocked. Hope you had a great long weekend.

  12. Dude, if you can handle the four flights of watery plunging and survive, I highly recommend Tower of Terror. Cause you get to watch the Twilight Zone too. And not get wet. Don’t worry about the ominous name, Disney likes to embellish.

  13. Props for using the word zaftig. It’s such an awesome word and so out of use that spell check thinks I’m spelling it incorrectly.

  14. I went to disney land too, september 2008! Stood in LA for two weeks (I’m european.) it was the best day ever! Haha. And I have a funny picture of Splash Mountain as a memory! xD

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