A Study in Possesive Behaviour in the Male of the Species

Case Study #1:

Long story short, I give my number to a complete stranger at Toys’R’Us (he has a somewhat rare car that my son (OK, its actually me) collects, and offers to sell it to me.  He alludes to a son, who also collects these cars).  I come home and phone Sulya, only just realizing what I had done.

S:  So you gave him your cell number right?

G:  Nope.  Home number.

S:  Oh my god, he has your home number, he can find your address, are you nut….wait a minute, was he cute?

G:  (I think, silently for a moment).  I guess he was.

S:  OH, that explains it, then.

Kind stranger calls to set up a time to drop by.  I kind of forget about him.  Saturday night, I get a call.  He is on his way.  In the meantime, I have started to go out for the evening, and am putting on the non-Mommy look (yup that’s right, the good bra, some eyeliner, and shoes without playground sand in them).  He comes to the door.  He brings cute kid with him.  I live on a quiet street and he is parked out front.  I believe said child is brought in to prove kind stranger is not a total whack-job.  I answer the door.  He gives me a look that makes me hold my breath for a second.  I realize not one man has looked at me like this in a very, very long time.  Pleasantries are exchanged, and the boys compare cars.  Many smiles are exchanged with kind stranger.  Then, very large husband decides to check out the action.  He says little, the purpose of his mission only to make his presence known.  Kind stranger’s face goes dark, his smile freezes.  He backs out of front hall.  I thank him profusely, and probably not for the car.  Very large husband resumes sitting on the couch ignoring me.

Case Study #2:

My son is at the park.  He has taken a tonka truck.  He has no particular fondness for this truck, but he has had it for a long time.  He lays it at the edge of the sandbox and walks away.  Another boy comes up and starts driving it in the sand.  Son runs over and wrenches it from other boy’s hand, yelling “Hey, that’s mine!”  I apologize to boy’s mother.  Boy moves on.  Son drops tonka truck, and goes back to sliding.

Conclusion:  The male of the species don’t fucking evolve.


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